{"id":599,"date":"2022-02-09T19:03:02","date_gmt":"2022-02-10T01:03:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.stolaf.edu\/sexual-respect-initiative\/?page_id=599"},"modified":"2023-06-07T08:36:02","modified_gmt":"2023-06-07T13:36:02","slug":"bystander-intervention","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/wp.stolaf.edu\/sexual-respect-initiative\/primary-prevention\/bystander-intervention\/","title":{"rendered":"Bystander Intervention"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I was in the kitchen at a party, talking with a guy I used to see, and he was getting very touchy and inappropriate. I didn\u2019t want to cut him off\u2014it had been a long time since we talked\u2014 but it felt awful. One of my friends noticed, and interrupted to invite me out for pizza. I was so thankful!<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n\n\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\n\t\t\t

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Steps to Actions<\/h2>\n\n\t\t\t<\/header>\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t
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\n \t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t \n\t\t\t\t\t\tPay Attention- Be alert to things that make you feel uncomfortable.\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n <\/button>\n \n\t\t\t\t\t
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While some situations are easily noticeable, many other situations are better characterized as concerning or high-risk behaviors that are likely to escalate to dangerous situations, including:<\/p>\n

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  • offensive comments<\/li>\n
  • atypical or withdrawn behavior<\/li>\n
  • controlling behavior in a relationship<\/li>\n
  • high-risk drinking (e.g., pre-gaming, taking shots, playing drinking games, blacking out, drinking alone).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    Sometimes, a person\u2019s gut instinct or intuition can be the best cue that a problem exists. Keep an eye on anything that\u2019s worrying. Don\u2019t ignore the \u2018little\u2019 stuff.<\/p>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/article>\n\n\t\t\t\n

    \n \t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t \n\t\t\t\t\t\tPersonal Responsibility- Decide if intervention is necessary. \t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n <\/button>\n \n\t\t\t\t\t
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    Recognize personal responsibility for intervention<\/em>.<\/h3>\n

    The question here is \u201cdo I need to act?\u201d It can be easy to assume that others will intervene so you don\u2019t have to, particularly, if other individuals or departments are charged with keeping the community safe<\/p>\n

    We are more likely to recognize the situation as requiring our help if:<\/p>\n

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    1. No one else is around;<\/li>\n
    2. We can relate to the issue on a personal level, such as if our friend\/family member is in danger;<\/li>\n
    3. We would want help if we were in that position; and\/or<\/li>\n
    4. We understand the impact the situation could have if it continues.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      The next step is interpreting the situation as a problem in need of intervention.<\/p>\n

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      • Is the person acting drunker than they are, or are they actually intoxicated?<\/li>\n
      • Are people who are standing close together being consensually affectionate, or is one being intimidating or aggressive towards the other?<\/li>\n
      • Has a friend seemed depressed for more than a week or two?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

        You may have to gather more information, for example by:<\/p>\n

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        • observing the situation<\/li>\n
        • checking in verbally<\/li>\n
        • asking someone else what they\u2019ve seen<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

          You may not be the person who needs to take direct action, but by identifying problems, you can help put the right solutions in place.<\/p>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/article>\n\n\t\t\t\n

          \n \t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t \n\t\t\t\t\t\tMake A Plan- Fit your intervention to the situation.\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n <\/button>\n \n\t\t\t\t\t
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          Who\u2019s in the best position to act?<\/p>\n

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          • Call on friends, allies, hosts, authority figures\u2014or do something yourself.<\/li>\n
          • When\u2019s the best moment? Now? Later? Do you need time to plan or to organize others?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

            Be creative and strategic.<\/p>\n

            Tips to protect yourself during interventions:<\/h3>\n
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            • Ask your friends to help.<\/li>\n
            • Approach others in a friendly manner.<\/li>\n
            • Avoid using violence.<\/li>\n
            • Call 911 or Public Safety for help if violence or harm seems unavoidable.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

              After you feel safe, you can focus on keeping a friend, acquaintance, or stranger safe, too. Taking action on one another\u2019s behalf is how we create a vibrant, healthy, and engaged community. When you intervene effectively, the rewards are significant \u2013 for you and for our campus.<\/p>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/article>\n\n\t\t\t\n

              \n \t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t \n\t\t\t\t\t\tIntervene- Follow through with your plan. \t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n <\/button>\n \n\t\t\t\t\t
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              Make It Happen- Stay calm.<\/h3>\n

              Act even if you feel awkward or nervous. Use the communication style that is most fitting for the situation.<\/p>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/article>\n\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n\t<\/div>\n\n\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\n\t\t

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              My friend was making out with another guy at a party, and I thought they would go home together. But then he caught my eye and kind of signaled. So I went up to them and pretended to be really drunk and needy. The other guy was bummed, but understood\u2013when your friend is falling-down-drunk, you have to take him home.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n\n\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\n\t\t

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