Magazine

“I believe in sharing our lives and vulnerabilities with one another.“

Since its founding, St. Olaf’s emphasis on vocation has helped those in its community discover their place in the world. To understand the prismatic ways that students, alumni, and faculty think about vocation in their own lives, we spoke to Oles in an array of different positions and places in their lives to understand what propels them and how they stay true to their values — in their own words.

Lauren Skare Ferry ’17 is a social worker in the intensive care unit at Methodist Hospital. Read her reflection below.

My role models, when it comes to creating and maintaining relationships, are my parents. They’re both pastors, and I watched them make connections with other people. It gave me a foundation — and a yearning — for social connection.

My parents were good at cultivating relationships among my siblings with daily check-ins. Every night, for example, we did “highs and lows” as a family, talking about the best part of our day and not-so-great part of our day. I liked the way that it allowed us to be individuals, but also to share our lives, our vulnerabilities, and our emotions with other people.

I’m drawn to people who are able to sit with me and celebrate my joys, but also show up and be with me during sadness or trials.

I also think it’s important to understand the way that relationships have different seasons. My friends at St. Olaf are incredibly important to me. When we were students, I saw them every day, I lived with them, and I ate with them. But when I left St. Olaf, we had to find new ways to maintain those connections. For a couple of my friends, that has meant watching The Bachelor together each week. Of course, it’s not about The Bachelor at all. It’s an excuse to get together once a week.

As an ICU social worker, I see a lot of people grieving — either a critical illness, or at the end of life. Big moments, like trips together, come up. But simpler things do, too — like they will miss talking to their loved ones. They will miss their smiles. These little things create a strong sense of connection.

So much of what builds meaningful relationships is our ability to be vulnerable with one another, and to express our authentic selves.