One of my friends maintains that our infants spend their first years with us creating a massive bank of love that they then draw on for years. I think our kids were arriving in their teen years about then. In fairness, they do replenish that bank some. I’ll be frank here – my son has been drawing on the bank again recently.

I went back and read the first email I sent you where I talk about stepping back and letting them take the lead. The voice in my head keeps repeating: “this is a moment to step aside.” I’m struggling, to be honest. I am anticipating that it’ll be easier when he isn’t in my home and I’m not seeing him draped over the couch not doing what I know he needs to get done if he’s going to be successful in this life. I am also anticipating the panicked text after his first exam – the one where he tells me that he really knows now that he needs help figuring this out and that I have to help him.

I suspect some of you will receive similar texts or calls and this is what I know – St. Olaf is set up for this. We have people and services that focus on helping students because we KNOW this experience is different and will challenge them differently. That moment may feel to your student as if they are an imposter in this place. And it’s not about being smart – you know they are and so do we. It is about developing skills and we’re here to help them do so. They may approach their professor(s) and their class dean. We have the Center for Advising and Academic Support, known on campus as CAAS. And for the record, YOU are welcome to contact the dean of students office to ask questions or to ask for our support as you encourage your student to seek help from the people who know.

One more thing for you as we close in on the start of the fall semester: On Tuesday, August 4 at 5:00 pm Central Daylight Time, three of our faculty will spend a Zoom hour with parents: “Academics for First Year Students: Q&A.” You can register for this virtual Q&A session here. They’ll talk about the academic program generally and in this time of distancing, and they’ll answer questions from you. As with the Questions & Advice session on July 22, this one will be recorded for those who cannot attend the live session.

Roz Eaton
Dean of Students